July 14, 2010
Sirah has been dressing up a lot with the neighbors and has entered her English queen accent phase. I remember when Maria was in this stage too. Funny how they both ended up there. She asked me just to lay with her last night until she feel asleep because it is calming and comforting to her. She has taken to telling me I am her queen and how beautiful I am. She has been especially noticing my hair and asking to braid it or play with it.
Maria has a birthday coming up and is in the pushing boundaries stage but still she and I had a several hour long heart to heart one morning before anyone else was up. Sitting on the couch in the living room and then in her bed talking on all sorts of topics and hopefully setting groundwork for these kinds of conversations all through the teenage years I thought about how much I am still enjoying our changing relationship. Time with me, especially undivided time is still very important to her. While I can no longer simply touch her and make the crying stop like when she was a baby I know that being there for her is the most comforting thing I can give her now.
"Your presence is soothing" - yes it is a Star Wars quote but one I often here from Serona. He just wants me around in the same room and near to him even when he is playing a video game or reading a book, engaged in a solo hobby he says it is better if I am just there with him.
It is good to be wanted so by so many people. I used to find it demanding and a bit draining, like everyone wants something all the time. Now though I look at it differently. I really am thankful they all want me around so much and that I really make a difference in their lives as they do in mine. I suppose it is easier now that no one needs to nurse or have their diapers changed and they can entertain themselves on their own when needed. Still it is if something in me switched and I realized not everyone has this sort of relationship with their spouse and kids and it is something I love about who we are. I realize the time is fleeting and maybe that makes it easier to embrace.
This weekend there were moments when everyone needed something and it felt like all I was doing was pouring out. Even Serona commmented on it and complimented me on it and I thought these are the moments that make up being a wife and mother and I am so very thankful for them. Too many moments to share but just a glimpse into my moments. Enjoy yours today.
Posted by Tenniel at 6:13 AM